Tuesday 14 August 2007

A Lesson

There was a time in my life that I had a very specific goal with one picture of myself in the future. The idea of that goal was so overwhelmingly in my mind that any other "picture" that I had of myself was somehow connected to it. I guess it's quite clear that after not reaching my goal, the disaster stroke my life. I felt empty and I couldn't convince myself to adopt any other goal as important as the previous one or at least a little appealing. I think the reason was I had no back up! I'd never thought of one and no one had told me until the time that the new situation embraced me. It was like you wanted to study Medicine, you did your best and then you started to study Chemistry. Which was exactly the thing that happened to me :).
This was my saddest memory till many years after, then as I got older and gained more experiences, I realized that such things could never been considered as disasters. But for a long time I was afraid of setting other goals. I turned to a completely conservative person. Now, I think my courage has finally come back. I have a goal! This time not so much specific though. This time with various pictures and different beautiful colors. This time they don't follow just one thing. They have more freedom, they have more life...

2 comments:

Hiva said...

you are right, now when you look back you see many problems that you had in your past dosen't seems significant anymore. like the way we look at 4 years old girl that crying hard when her icecream fall down from the cone...:):)

Behdokht said...

That's right Hiva joonam,I wish I could see the present with all its sides as realistic as the past and didn't have to wait for the future to see it clearly,

Love you :).